5 Habits of Amazing Conversationalists

5 Habits of Amazing Conversationalists

All of us are not Born Conversationalists...Next time you find yourself in an uncomfortable networking situation, try to practice these 5 habits. 

You know the type:  That colleague of yours who can charm her way to a brand new opportunity. If that sounds like you, consider yourself lucky!

For the rest of us, it can be really uncomfortable to build rapport with a stranger without running into awkwardly long pauses, immediately followed by a quick getaway. “Excuse me; I need to use the restroom!” Who hasn’t used that one? It’d be a lot easier if it was an innate skill, but here’s the good news: Conversation is a skill that we can hone just like any other soft skill.

1. Practice Talk: Listen Ratio ----   1: 10

In case we truly want to understand the person we are with, our talk-listen ratio should be 1:10.

If you make it a goal to try and get the other person to talk 90 percent of the time, you’ll be better off than most people who “listen with the blatant intent to talk. Don’t be that guy who’s just waiting for his turn to speak & who eagerly injects words whenever possible, or worse, interrupts in between.
Ten out of 10 communication experts agree that to be a great conversationalist, the most important thing you can do is listen, think and respond in a way that shows you’re truly listening.

A great, simple way to build rapport is to refer something she mentioned before. “Hey, I visited that place you mentioned and it was amazing!” Boom!!! She’ll not only know that you listened but also respected her opinion. It’s the little things that earn trust and boost conversational IQ!

 

2. Genuinely Ask Great Questions

Your [conversational] IQ goes up when you ask a question that exhibits genuine curiosity. Done authentically and with integrity, it's natural for a conversation to then move into new territory. Inspiring questions create that elusive thing we call chemistry between people.

Communications experts can’t emphasize this point enough: We find others to be interesting when they are interested in us. So if you want to be an interesting person, be interested in her.

3. Avoid telling someone they’re wrong

Great conversationalists want to make others feel good about them during the conversation. If one makes someone genuinely feel good, he/she is one step closer to making an ally.
Even if one comes across someone whom he thinks is totally wrong, it’s crucial to respect their opinion. This also doesn’t mean we necessarily agree but no one likes to be told their opinion is wrong. It’s always better not to be too argumentative in a great conversation.

4. Body Language is the Key

The way you present yourself while chatting can convey a lot more than you might assume. For instance, the general consensus is that tensely folded arms mean you are closed to what someone is telling you, while if you like what you hear, you’ll likely adopt an open posture, and even lean forward a little.
Standing too far away can signal discomfort. Lack of eye contact can have the same effect. Touching your hair too much is a dead giveaway that you’re nervous. If you simply focus on making good eye contact (without being creepy) and mirror their body language, you’ll have a stronger connection.

5. Read about Issues from Different Point of Views

“Read newspapers!” Whether print or online, one should take time out to read newspapers from around the world. To get a sense of what is happening from different perspectives.
This way, while conversing one can dig into something one has read about and add cool, new information to the conversation. For a totally holistic perspective, one may pick an issue and then read five articles about the issue from five different countries. This can help an individual to relate to brand new people from all walks of life.